These past few days have been crazy. I woke up on Sunday morning bleeding and cramping. That is a sign of a miscarriage. I went through the whole day sure of the fact that we had lost our baby and she was with Jesus. Yes, I think it's a girl. (we will see as time will tell) We prayed about it and released her to Jesus. I had a peace about it and knew it was going to be okay. We went to the family doctor on Monday and she did an ultrasound. Thankfully, there was a heartbeat! Everything was back to normal, although I felt a little confused as I really was convinced that the baby went to be with Jesus. It was definitely an emotional day. Tuesday everything was back to normal and the bleeding had stopped. Wednesday, today, started out normal then all of the sudden I started cramping again and there was more blood then Monday. It really scared me. I thought okay this is it, we really are going to miscarry. I got an appointment with the OBGYN. I wasn't nervous, just unsure with the news we were about it get. The dr. did another ultrasound and the baby was fine, there was a heartbeat, and all was well. Except there was a large blood sac on the outside of the baby sac. So it doesn't directly affect the baby but it is known as a "threatened miscarriage" or an extra choronic bleeding. The doctor's analogy that he gave us was, "it's like putting up wallpaper and then half of it coming down". Ya, still not quite understanding but he wasn't too worried. He put me on bedrest until the new year. I can't exercise (so there goes the half marathon) pick up anything heavy, work or do the "deed" (hehe). This was not in my plan...not at all. I don't even have my christmas shopping done!!!! The last thing I want to hear is that I cannot do anything. I hate just sitting there and not be able to do anything. Especially because I do deal with depression a little and the less active I am the more the depression comes on. I honestly am a little afraid of my mood turning into a not so happy one but I am going to make the most of it. I guess this will be a good refresher and a little reatreat to get to know Jesus again and hangout with Him all the time. I won't be able to be busy...which is good and bad.
God has it all in control. Even the dr told us that we can't control what is going on in my body, only God can. So it's God's and I will rest because that is the best for this new baby!
